I have been quietly observing the fracas over the infamous "date rape is funny" scene in Seth Rogan's new movie. At this point, I'm more interested in the discussion itself. A lot of people are arguing that "it's just a joke in a stupid movie; calm down." I would direct these people to read the comments on just about any given article on the movie scene. The problem isn't the scene itself, but that so many people feel that the actions therein are perfectly acceptable. Here's an excellent example, pulled at random from a Huffington Post comment thread, by user keerod76:

When I watched the movie on Friday I didn't think of it as a date rape scene. It reminded me of when I hooked up with girl and we were both drunk out of our minds.

Indeed. What I'm seeing is a trend: not only do many women think "rape can never happen to me," many men think "I could never commit rape." But they then fail to understand what "consent" really means. I shouldn't have to point this out, but "lying there unconscious" does not equal "consent." Having sex with someone who has not consented to it is rape. Keerod76 is a rapist. Just because he would be horrified to hear that doesn't make it untrue. Second, I wonder how the discussion would be different if we mixed this scene up a little. Let's posit a scene where Seth Rogan goes out drinking with a male buddy. They have a great time, and stagger back to Rogan's place in the wee hours of the morning. Next scene: Rogan is lying in bed, face down and unconscious, while his buddy humps him. Pause scene, and wait for audience reaction. Shock? Horror? Visceral disgust? Oh, it's just a joke in a stupid movie; calm down. Continue playing: Rogan's buddy stops and checks on him. Rogan mutters "Don't stop." Pause scene: is it funny now? Does Rogan's belated consent make it funny? Is it okay to laugh? Next version: Rogan and a friend (of either gender) go drinking, and stagger home. Scene: Rogan is lying in bed, face down and unconscious, while his friend pokes through his wallet. His friend pulls out a wad of cash and credit cards. "Hey, can I take this?" The friend asks. "Sure, go ahead," Rogan grunts, before passing out again. Is this okay? Is it funny? Is it alright if Rogan's friend takes all of his money? After all, Rogan said it was okay, so it must be, right? I only ask because I'm trying to figure out how this works, this "rape is funny" thing. I think that the scene makes sense in the context of the movie, which isn't advocating that you smash a kid's face in with a skateboard, either. Rogan's character does bad things, is what I'm saying. And this is yet another bad thing. The problem is that so many people don't see it that way, as a bad thing. They don't understand why everyone is upset. And unfortunately everyone involved with the movie is acting like they think the reaction is pretty funny, and hey, it's free publicity, which is great. Edgy, even. YHBT? I wish.